Just a quick note! Last week, I was thrilled to write a guest post (Want to Be a Force for Good? Choose Minimalism) on Becoming Minimalist. If you haven’t seen it, I’d love if you checked it out here. If you found my Substack as a result of that post, welcome! So glad you’re here.
Today, we’re going to get super practical with some strategies to be more intentional online and break the “add to cart” habit.
Online shopping isn’t all bad, of course— it provides ample opportunities to support small and sustainable businesses and buy eco-conscious and fair trade products that may not be available in your local super-centers.
But, unlike shopping in store, online shopping is available 24/7 right at your fingertips— meaning you can buy shoes while waiting at the doctor’s office, scroll through children’s toys while your kids swing in the backyard, or find an inflatable party sheep (concerningly not the strangest thing on Amazon…) while watching a TikTok. In fact, the average American spends six hours and 58 minutes— nearly half their waking hours— online every day, Much of this time is spent on social media, which has its own issues, but online shopping monopolizes several hours a week for the average internet user.
So to reclaim your time, here are just a few ways to be more intentional with your online shopping:
Unsubscribe from e-mail lists
Shopping with a store once doesn’t make them entitled to your repeat attention and business any more than going on one lack-luster date entitles your would-be suitor to your hand in marriage. Use the unsubscribe button mercilessly to avoid temptation.
Before you say anything, I know, I know, e-mails are where the promo codes live. But, spoiler alert: A quick Google search is likely to give you any promo code you might need. And if you are concerned about having access to coupon or promo codes from a business you might actually buy from, try setting up a “coupon code” e-mail address. This is where you subscribe to your favorite stores for promo codes– BUT you don’t use this for your orders or any other online activity. Check it for coupons only if you have already identified something you need to purchase.
As an experiment, I recently tracked how many e-mails a handful of retailers sent me (to my coupon account, of course) over the course of the month: 37. Not 37 total, 37 emails PER RETAILER. That means that each retailer was e-mailing me, on average, more than once a day. If this were an e-mail account I was regularly checking, I would be receiving distracting messages encouraging me to '“Save 40% while you still can!” and reminding me that “Summer’s On Sale” dozens of times per day.
Put password locks on tempting websites
This has been, hands down, one of the most effective strategies for those I work with— especially people who have a tendency to over-spend on Amazon. A 5-minute time lock per day— or a lock for all but once or twice a week— is enough time to “get in, get out” for anything you truly need (like toothpaste or toilet paper) but not enough time for you to get lost in a rabbit hole of light saber chopsticks, ostrich pillows, or other weird things on Amazon.
A 5-minute time lock per day is enough time to “get in, get out” for anything you truly need but not enough time for you to get lost in a rabbit hole of light saber chopsticks, ostrich pillows, or other weird things on Amazon.
Set restrictions on where or when you will engage in online shopping
Keep track of when you are most likely to shop, and place parameters on your “add to cart” usage if you don’t love your existing habits. Maybe you decide that you will only shop on Sunday evenings, or you won’t shop after 9 p.m. Perhaps you decide you can shop during your lunch break, but not when you’re at your desk during work hours, or when you’re home engaged with your kids.
Industry research indicates that Mondays and Thursdays are the most common days for online shopping, with 10 am and 8-9 pm being the most active shopping times… which tells me a lot of people are shopping on their first coffee break at work and right after the kids are in bed! If this works for you, great… but if not, commit to changing that habit.
Personally, I will shop for groceries from my phone (super convenient!), but most other purchases I save for my laptop— it’s much harder to pull out, so I have to set aside some dedicated time to complete the purchase. (Also, too many phone tabs make my head spin!).
These rules aren’t set in stone forever, and they can change as your life seasons change— but setting the parameters helps you to be more intentional.
Clear your online shopping carts
One of the habits my husband finds most aggravating about me (to be honest, it would probably aggravate me too…) is my tendency to sit on purchases for what feels like forever. I only recently purchased pasta plates that I’ve been eyeing for four years… (yes, literally four years. You read that right). I have, more than once, been undecided about a purchase for long enough that, weeks or months later, the item has gone out of stock (this is probably a pretty good hint that I didn’t need the “thing” in the first place).
As a result, for as much as 24-hour or 3-day or 30-day waiting periods before a purchase may work for others, they do nothing for me. I can sit on a want for months or years and it doesn’t faze me. So instead, I’ve begun “forcing a decision” once a week. Either I believe the item will bring enough value to my life that I should purchase it, or I clear it from my cart/ delete the bookmark/ never think about it again.
How do I know something will add value to my life?
What will I be using this item for? How often do I see myself using it?
What feeling am I associating with this item? Am I expecting this purchase to bring me a sense of relaxation or accomplishment, or signal some virtue like “well-educated” or “outdoorsy”? These feelings aren’t all bad, but it does help to recognize them.
Do I have something that already serves a similar purpose? Could I use that instead?
If I am making this purchase, am I making the purchase in alignment with my values— is it from a small business, it it sustainably/ ethically produced, can I find it secondhand? Obviously not everything you bring into your life will meet all of these criteria, but if a purchase doesn’t meet any of your individual values, that’s a red flag.
Deciding to make the purchase sometimes means adding it to an upcoming birthday/ Christmas list (especially in the case of my little ones), or creating a budget plan. I’m not advocating for reckless spending just because you need to clear your shopping cart. But when you make the decision, you can stop reading reviews for the umpteenth time and move on with your life.
Make a plan for your online time
If you are scrolling, you are being exposed to hundreds of advertisements— and these ads are remarkably effective at making you feel inadequate, like the fix is just a few clicks away. The best way to reduce your exposure to advertisements? Reduce your scrolling.
This means that, when you plan to be on your technology, set your intention— before you even pick up your phone or power on your laptop.
I’m in a life stage with two toddlers where my phone is sometimes the only thing I can easily access during late-night nursing sessions or when I’m nap-trapped under a sleeping little one. And chances are, you might find yourself in the same boat of wanting to access your phone during public transport commutes, long waits for appointments, or to wind down at the end of the day. But to keep yourself from doom-scrolling or mindless shopping, try keeping a list of to-dos for your phone. For me, this list is often clearing out my photos, going through my e-mail inbox, or reading an e-book… and which one I do depends on my mental bandwidth at the moment. But picking up my phone with a clear intent saves me from wondering what sales I might be missing.
Or, of course, you can always put down your phone and live your life.
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